Kiss
Puke
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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