Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
