white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Fuck me I smell like cheese
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
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