you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
