If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
