I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
