didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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