I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize
