I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
