This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
