I'm jealous of your bromance
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
Randomize
