i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
