Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
