That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize
