Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize
