help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
