Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
