fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
