tell your sister to shave her snatch
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
