are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Bring me that man meat
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
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