Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Randomize
