I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
