it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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