then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
