plz talk dirty to me
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize
