Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
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