did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
