i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
how do flat chested girls get laid?
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
Randomize
