I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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