how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
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