yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize