Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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