every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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