dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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