i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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