therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
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