i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize
