so explain again why im purple
no
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
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