He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
