mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize