fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
babies were throwing up all over the place
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize