I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
