Already got asked if we're dating
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
Randomize