Non-Jews are for practice
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Randomize
