therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
