I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Randomize
