I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Randomize
