Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
