Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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