Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Randomize