Grow some girl-balls and come out already
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Randomize
