I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Randomize
