I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
