Whats the glycemic index on semen?
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
